


Same Time, Next Year

by stillskies



Category: Hikaru no Go
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-03-04
Updated: 2012-03-04
Packaged: 2017-11-01 03:22:45
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,078
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/351418
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/stillskies/pseuds/stillskies
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Once a year, Hikaru dreams of Sai.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Same Time, Next Year

**Author's Note:**

> Written for round 6 of [Blind Go](http://blind-go.livejournal.com/).

He opened his eyes and immediately recognized his surroundings. Quickly, he turned around, searching, half-hoping that he would find him and half-expecting not to.

Sai was standing just to his left, smiling gently.

“Sai,” Hikaru breathed, running to stand in front of him. “I didn’t think I’d get to see you again! It’s been a year since I dreamt about you, and then you were gone.”

Sai didn’t say anything, just stood there, smiling.

“Still not going to say anything, huh?” Hikaru groused, but he was grinning widely. “That’s fine. I have so much to tell you, you wouldn’t be able to say anything anyway.”

A tinkling sound enveloped him, and, for a moment, he thought it was Sai’s laughter, but it was too sad and didn’t quite match the sound in his memory.

“I beat Touya in the Honinbou league,” he started. “But then Kurata-san beat me in the next round. He still doesn’t have a title, by the way. He’s challenging Kuwabara-sensei, though, but Kuwabara-sensei doesn’t seem worried.” He paused, thoughts running through his mind. There was so much to tell Sai about, but he was worried that he didn’t have enough time to tell him everything. “Touya-sensei is playing in the Korean League. Well, he has been for a while. Touya says he seems quieter lately, but I can’t tell, because Touya-sensei is always quiet.

“Isumi-san passed the pro exam last year, but I think I told you that,” Hikaru added, frowning. “Fukui and Nase passed this round, though. And Tsubaki-san and Kawai-san meet me once a week to yell at me, even though I’m way better than both of them.”

Sai nods, smile still in place.

“You have to go, don’t you?” Hikaru asked, doing his best to keep from sound frantic. “I’ll get to see you again, though, right?”

Sai didn’t say anything, just disappeared.

Not that Hikaru had expected him to say anything, anyway.

\---

“Were you sad when you disappeared, Sai?” he asked the next year. He is lying on the floor next to Sai, staring up at the sky. There was more color this year, he noticed, not just shades of white and ivory. “I asked you that before, but you never answer. Why not?”

Silence.

“Man, I used to want you to be quiet all the time,” Hikaru mused sadly. “Now, I just wish you would say something.”

Sai looked at him sadly, and Hikaru smiled back.

“Don’t worry about it,” he said. “I get to see you, so, it’s fine. Anyway, let’s talk about something else, okay? Touya got his first title. He took it from Ogata-san. Touya-jyuudan. I told him it sounds funny, but he just rolled his eyes. You think it sounds funny, right, Sai? I mean, he sounds like his dad, now.

“Touya-sensei asked me about you the other day, though. Touya thinks Touya-sensei is still waiting to play you.”

The sleeve of Sai’s kimono brushed against his arm, and Hikaru sat up. “Time to go, huh?”

Sai nodded.

“Okay. Same time, next year?” Hikaru joked quietly as Sai disappeared. “I’ll be waiting.”

\---

“I got my first title! Totally beat Touya to it, too. I’m now Shindou-Ouza. Touya wanted it because when he played Zama-sensei, he was an ass, but Touya-sensei took the title from Zama-sensei, and Touya wanted it to rub it in Zama-sensei’s face, except he’d do it politely, because Touya’s too nice,” Hikaru rattled on. “Waya is in the Honinbou League, now. Kuwabara-sensei is still alive, too, and he’s picking on Isumi-san. 

“Ogata-san’s been missing games. Touya says it’s because Honinbou and Meijin died, so I sent him a card. Honinbou and Meijin were two of his fish. He really likes fish. Touya and I got him a really nice one for his birthday this year. I think that’s the only time I’ve seen him smile. Well, without the creepy, anyway.”

Hikaru looked at the sky. “There’s blue this year,” he said out loud. “I wonder what color we’ll get next year.”

He pulled on his t-shirt. “It’s summer,” he added. “I never took you to a real festival, did I? You’d have liked it. There are lots of people and lots of booths. You can win prizes, like stuffed animals. I won Akari one yesterday. Mitani was mad because he couldn’t win anything.”

The sky started to fade, and when he looked back, Sai was gone.

\---

“Akira got his second title,” he said quietly. “You should have seen the game. It was brilliant. You would have been so proud of him.”

The sky this year had tints of orange, and looked like an actual sky on the verge of sunset.

“I won’t see you again after this, will I?” 

Sai stared back at him, and Hikaru could see the words that Sai couldn’t say.

“It’s too bad we can’t play a game,” he said, and he could hear the forced cheerfulness in his voice. “I could probably beat you now, you know. Even Akira says I’m crazy strong.”

His voice was catching in his throat, and he felt tears stinging at the corners of his eyes. “It’s not fair, you know? Why can’t you come back, Sai? I’d even let you play Touya-sensei and Akira and Ogata-san, but you won’t come back and you never say anything. I only get to see you once a year, and I won’t even get that now, huh?

“Thank you.” He laughed, and a tear slid down his cheek. “I never got to say that. You left before I could. It’s not too late, right?”

Sai shook his head.

“Good. I’m glad. I’m going to tell Akira about you, because I told him I would, and it’s been four years. I don’t think he’ll believe me, but. And Grandpa gave me your goban. Sometimes I think that, if I clean it enough, you’ll come back and knock me out like you did the first time.”

The sky was getting brighter, and Hikaru knew he was running out of time. He took a step forward, and then another one, until he was right in front of Sai.

“I’m sorry,” he said, cheeks wet and voice strained. “I’m sorry I was selfish. I’m sorry that I wasn’t strong enough to play without you.” He wrapped his arms around Sai and felt Sai’s hand on his head. “I hope you’re happy.”

Sai smiled down at him and began to fade.

“Thank you, Hikaru.”

And then he was grasping air.


End file.
